Inviting a nanny into your home is a big step. For many families, it’s the first time they’ve shared their personal space, routines, and parenting decisions with someone new. It’s very common for parents to tell us, “I don’t know how to act,” or “I just want them to feel comfortable.”

If that’s you, take a deep breath. Feeling unsure is normal, and there is no perfect way to do this. What matters most is creating a respectful, clear, and welcoming environment where everyone can thrive.

Here’s how to help your nanny feel comfortable, supported, and set up for success in your home.

Start With Clear Expectations

One of the biggest sources of discomfort on both sides is uncertainty. Before your nanny’s first day, talk through:

• Daily schedule and routines
• Childcare priorities and parenting style
• Household expectations related to meals, naps, outings, and screen time
• What tasks are included and what are not
• How you prefer to communicate feedback

Clear expectations don’t feel rigid. They feel safe. When a nanny knows what you value and what success looks like in your home, they can confidently do their job.

Remember: This Is Their Workplace

While your home is personal and intimate, it is also your nanny’s place of work. Small considerations go a long way in making someone feel respected:

• Provide a space to store personal items
• Let them know they’re welcome to use the bathroom, kitchen, and common spaces
• Offer clarity around food, drinks, and coffee
• Avoid hovering or micromanaging

A nanny who feels trusted will show up more confidently and independently.

It’s Okay If It Feels Awkward at First

The early days can feel strange. You’re learning something new, your children are adjusting, and someone new is moving through your space.

That awkwardness is temporary.

Give yourselves time to find a rhythm. Trust builds through consistency, open communication, and shared care for your children. Most nanny-family relationships grow more natural with each passing week.

Communicate Openly and Kindly

Your nanny is not a mind reader. If something is working well, say it. If something needs adjusting, talk about it early and respectfully.

Helpful communication sounds like:
• “We’ve noticed this really works for our child.”
• “Can we try this approach and see how it goes?”
• “We appreciate how you handled that.”

Feedback should feel like collaboration, not correction.

Respect Their Professional Experience

You hired a nanny for a reason. Trust their experience, especially when it comes to child development, routines, and daily care.

This doesn’t mean giving up your role as a parent. It means working as a team, where everyone’s knowledge is valued.

When nannies feel respected as professionals, they stay longer and invest more deeply in your family.

Create Space for Autonomy

Once expectations are set, allow your nanny to take the lead during their working hours. Children benefit when caregivers feel confident and empowered, and nannies do their best work when they aren’t constantly second-guessing themselves.

Autonomy builds trust. Trust builds stability.

Lead With Appreciation

A simple thank you matters more than you think. Acknowledging effort, consistency, and care goes a long way in building a strong relationship.

A nanny who feels appreciated feels connected. A nanny who feels connected shows up with heart.

Finding the Silver Lining

Having a nanny in your home is an adjustment, but it can also become one of the most supportive relationships your family builds. With open communication, mutual respect, and a little grace on both sides, your home can become a space where everyone feels comfortable and valued.

If you ever need guidance on navigating nanny relationships, transitions, or expectations, the Silver Lining team is always here to help you find your silver lining in every season of parenthood.

Welcoming a Nanny Into Your Home: How to Build a Comfortable, Successful Relationship